Motherhood advice from a 23-year-old mom

By Lindsey Bryan
lindsey.bryan@chatsworthtimes.com

At twenty-three, a lot of my friends are beginning to settle down and get married. These same friends ask my advice about if they should have kids yet or wait because I'm a young mom of two. I hear friends go back and forth about whether or not they are ready to take that step. Most people get overwhelmed by all the cute little dresses or tiny little Nikes they saw at the store yesterday. They see the cute nursery pins on Pinterest and think, "I want a baby!” My best friend thought that she was ready to be a mom after spending time with my children... until she became a mom. She cried to me, "Why did you let me do this so soon? This is so hard!"
Having a baby changes everything, no matter if you're trying to get pregnant or not. If you're thinking about mommyhood, you need to consider a few things before you go volunteering your uterus to act as an oven for the next 40 weeks.
First of all, I cannot stress this enough: Make sure you are ready to give up your life. If you are a young parent, just because you are young doesn't mean you get to act like it all the time. I'm twenty-three years old, but I have a husband and two toddlers. That's not the same twenty-three as the single recent college graduate with no responsibilities. The minute you decide to have a child, that child becomes the only thing in the world that matters anymore. Gone are your weekends once spent out with friends. Gone are the nights you spend having a few beers with the gang. You have another life to worry about, and you have to grow up. Fast. You live for nothing else except that life growing inside of you, and later, the life and person that you brought into this world.
Realize that those cute ribbon diaper covers and bottles you saw on Pinterest are not real life. You need to smell a bottle that rolled under the car seat two weeks ago that you somehow missed, or change a diaper that should have been changed thirty minutes ago but you didn't have any extra diapers with you on your run to Bi-Lo. Stay up all night with a baby that's crying and you have no idea what to do to make her stop. Carry an infant carrier with you everywhere you go for a year. EVERY time you get out of the car. EVERY time you go in the house. EVERY time you go pay for gas. EVERY time you go into Starbucks to grab a coffee. EVERY time you run to the ATM. EVERY time you do anything at all. Every time? EVERY TIME.
Before you leave the house, pack an entire bag separate from your purse with your car keys, cell phone, wallet, debit card, ID, money, lip gloss, compact, personal items, etc. Make sure you pack a diaper bag. This includes (but is not limited to) formula, bottled water, diapers, scented diaper disposal bags, hand sanitizer, wipes, a few extra outfits, a pacifier, bibs, a burp cloth, an extra pair of socks, an extra bottle, diaper cream, toys, your baby's favorite book, snacks, Capri Suns, and Tylenol- just in case. Do this every single time you leave your house for three years. Every. Single. Time.
Why would anybody in their right mind sign up for this? It's not fun. It's hard. It will test you to your limits and make you feel like you're about to break.
Motherhood is also the most rewarding experience I could ever begin to imagine. There are more positives than I could ever express. It's worth it- when you're ready.  But if you're questioning getting pregnant, think about these things. These are reality. Not Pinterest or Babies R Us.
If you aren't ready, wait. You have all the time in the world. If you decide you are ready, join the club and realize what it's like to live your life in a constant whirlwind of sippy cups, Goldfish and slobbery kisses.